Journal of Financial Planning: November 2023
Julie Fortin, CFP®, FBS, CeFT, is a partner at Northstar Financial Planning (https://northstarfp.com) where she specializes in financial life planning and financial psychology. She holds a Master of Finance degree from Suffolk University’s Sawyer School of Business and a graduate certificate in financial psychology and behavioral finance from Creighton University. Julie serves on the board of the Financial Therapy Association and is the 2021 recipient of the Montgomery–Warschauer Award for outstanding contribution to the betterment of the financial planning profession by the Financial Planning Association for her research paper on relational neuroscience (IPNB).
Mary Martin, Ph.D., (www.marymartinphd.com) is a Brown University-certified teacher of mindfulness-based stress reduction, a certified Mindful Schools instructor, and a certified trauma-sensitive mindfulness practitioner. She has a doctorate from New York University’s School of Culture, Education, and Human Development. She started teaching mindfulness practices to financial advisers in 2015 and launched her course, Mindfulness for Financial Advisors: Practicing a New Way of Being (7.5 CFP® CEs), in 2019. Her book by the same name was published in 2022.
You have a way of being all day long. It might change—whipsaw even—from moment to moment, depending on external circumstances and your internal state. You have a way of being right now. Can you access it and describe it? Are you grounded, impatient, calm, or irritated? What sensations are present in your body and what thoughts are in your mind? While you’re at it, what’s the quality of your mind? Is it clear, foggy, or buzzing from caffeine?
We ask these questions because your way of being affects those around you. When you’re with another person, you each contribute to a shared space that’s unique to that moment. And if you’re not intentional about your state of being and ensuring you have a well-regulated nervous system, your way of being will not be helpful and you will not be best positioned to notice what’s happening with the other person.1 Your client’s experience of you, CX (client experience), comes from the experience you’re having with yourself, AX (adviser experience).
It’s clear why well-being is top of mind for many, and we can look to the most recent Gallup State of the Global Workplace Report2 and APA/Harris Poll3 for insight about causes. The 2023 Gallup report showed the United States and Canada are tied with East Asia for the highest daily stress, and that stress is at a record high. The 2022 APA/Harris Poll offered these statistics:
70 percent of adults reported they do not think people in the government care about them, and 64 percent said they felt their rights are under attack. Further, nearly half of adults (45 percent) said they do not feel protected by the laws in the United States. More than a third (38 percent) said the state of the nation has made them consider moving to a different country.
More than three-quarters of adults (76 percent) said that the future of our nation is a significant source of stress in their lives, while 68 percent said this is the lowest point in our nation’s history that they can remember.
Before we move on to what we can do as individuals, you may recall our July article in this journal asked, “What if we lived in a world that prioritized well-being over economic returns? What would it look like? What would have to happen in order to create that world?” As critical as self-care is to our well-being, we need to acknowledge there are systemic causes for a lot of stress—particularly related to the workplace, race, and whether one feels protected by the powers of the law. Self-care is not the solution to burn out, racism, or discrimination. The solution is changing conditions, culture, and norms (and swapping out some leaders), so the above outcomes aren’t practically inevitable. We’re by no means proposing well-being practices as a way to fix systemic problems or as a means of accepting the current state of affairs.
With all that said, there’s a bigger picture around well-being and financial planners, as they’re on the receiving end of the stress of their clients and colleagues, all day long. To protect themselves as well as help alleviate some of the stress of their clients, planners have an opportunity by getting their own well-being as optimized as possible. When you go through the process of figuring out what you need to operate at your best, however you define that, you’re a model for others. They see and feel that you’re “together” in different aspects of your life, and that’s important. As Dr. Joe Coughlin, director of Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s AgeLab wrote (in a recent written correspondence): “Clients are looking for more than a money manager, retirement planner, or wealth manager, they are now looking for someone that can understand and support their well-being. For them to believe you are that person, you have to reflect your own success in managing your well-being financially, physically, and emotionally. You can’t provide trusted advice on what you can’t demonstrate that you can do yourself.”
Fortunately, there are plenty of researchers studying well-being and designing interventions and protocols that cultivate it. There isn’t consensus about what domains to include or some of the details of how to go about improving well-being, but one message is clear: well-being isn’t one thing. For example, quality sleep has been having its moment in the spotlight. But if you aren’t eating well, you’re drinking alcohol, all you do is work, and/or you don’t have solid social connections, your perfect sleep protocol isn’t going to deliver the well-being you seek.
Closing the Gap Between Knowing and Doing
Regardless of which definition of well-being you use (The What), the way to get there (The How) is through daily habits. While this isn’t groundbreaking information to any of us, the tens of thousands of books and journals on Amazon dedicated to habit change and promising “transformation” demonstrate there’s no one answer to closing the gap between what you know you should do and what you actually do. The answer to what you should do to change your habits or create new ones is . . . whatever works for you—whatever you will reliably do. If there was one most-effective way that was easy to implement, we’d all be doing it.
If your daily habits remain what they are now, you know almost everything you need to know about who you’ll be in three months. Unexpected circumstances might arise that alter your habits as habit discontinuity theory posits and was widely discussed at the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. With the dramatic change in circumstances such as no longer going to happy hour, some people stopped drinking alcohol. Meanwhile, others drank more at home. Due to gym closures, some people stopped working out entirely while others worked out more—and streamed their workouts for all to see.
Awareness-Based Practices—The Why
Awareness-based practices can powerfully affect your well-being, which informs your way of being, and in turn informs how your client is when you’re together: AX CX. The reason we’re recommending awareness-based practices is the bigger picture—using neuroplasticity to your advantage. The following five practices offer different avenues to awareness. If you do them regularly, you’re doing something much bigger than doing them in those moments; you’re creating a brain that predicts greater awareness. And all insight into yourself and others begins with awareness.
1. Awareness of Mental Events and ‘Feeling Tone’
Mental Events: Mental events include thoughts and images. Those short films that play in your head, sometimes on a continuous loop? Those are mental events. The monologue in your head of you narrating your life? That’s a mental event. And sometimes it’s a dialogue.
Right now, notice where your feet and hands are as well as any sensations present. Notice your posture. Observe your breath. Do you remember how this article started? Are you scanning words without processing them? It’s OK if you are, as our mind’s default state isn’t concentration, which is why we have to learn how to do it. Non-judgment and self-compassion should always travel with practicing awareness. You can set yourself up to attend to your mental events by attaching checking in on them to an action, say, reaching for something. Anything. The refrigerator door, your phone, your coffee cup. When you reach, you check in with your mind. What is present?
What mental events are occupying your mind, right now?
Feeling Tone: At every moment while you’re conscious, you have what’s called feeling tone or mood. It has two components: (1) a general feeling of pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral; and (2) an accompanying arousal level, e.g., from one to 10. For example, you might be feeling pleasant right now, and your arousal level is low—maybe a three. You might describe yourself as “chill.”
Your brain creates your emotions using your feeling tone, your memories, and whatever circumstances it predicts you’re in. Your feeling tone, then, is a window into the future. It foreshadows the direction of your perception. If your feeling tone is unpleasant and your arousal level is a nine, you’re going to see the world through that lens.
What’s your feeling tone right now?
2. Awareness of Walking
Mindful walking isn’t a stroll for pleasure or a brisk set of movements meant to be a workout. It’s more like a slow set of movements meant to be a workout, and the workout is both physical and mental.
This awareness activity revolves around maintaining your attention on the physical sensations related to walking. Your mission is to take five steps, turn around, and walk back to where you started. Move slowly and intentionally so you feel every tiny and large movement, but not so slowly that you lose your balance. You’re getting to know everything that’s involved in keeping yourself steady and upright while moving your body forward. When your mind wanders or you begin to talk to yourself about what you’re doing—or about anything else—return your attention to your body. Focus on its sensations.
Mindful walking can be a humbling experience of self-exploration. And when you train your mind and body to be aware in this way, you’ll find it occurs to you to similarly attend to other movements. Curiosity takes over and suddenly you’re wondering about the sensations relating to typing on your computer keyboard and how they’re different to the ones when you’re typing on your phone. Or when you’re pushing or pulling a heavy door versus a door that’s easy to open. Wonder and awe of the mechanics of the human body are inevitable once you start paying attention.
How can you build mindful walking into your day today? It just takes a few minutes, and you can do it anywhere.
3. Awareness of Rest
In our hectic lives, it’s easy to overlook the importance of sleep. However, a good night’s rest is vital for the restoration and rejuvenation of both our bodies and minds. During sleep, the brain processes emotions, consolidates memories, and repairs the body. Chronic sleep deprivation can lead to a host of physical and mental health issues, including impaired cognitive function, weakened immune systems, and increased stress.
Not all sleep is restful, though, and not all rest is the purview of sleep. Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, author of Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity, talks about seven types of rest—physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, sensory, social, and creative. Her version of self-care reminds us of the many ways we can become exhausted that have nothing to do with sleep. She parses rest in a thorough way that overlaps with and shows an appreciation for awareness. “What steals your rest?” she asks.
If there’s one thing that steals the rest of many planners, it’s not having good boundaries. Even when our work is something we enjoy, there should still be times when we’re deliberately taking a mental rest from work. Times when we purposefully will not be scheduling meetings, checking email, or accessible to clients or colleagues. Having these boundaries in advance gives us permission to rest from everyday work.
What’s been stealing your rest lately?
4. Awareness of Social-Media and News Consumption
What we consume, both physically and mentally, greatly influences our well-being. A balanced and nutritious diet is the foundation of physical health, providing the body with essential nutrients it needs to function optimally. Similarly, being mindful of our mental consumption is equally vital. Engaging in positive and uplifting content, surrounding ourselves with supportive relationships, and minimizing exposure to negative influences can significantly impact our emotional well-being. According to a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association in 2020,4 spending more than two hours per day consuming news related to the COVID-19 pandemic was associated with higher levels of anxiety and distress among participants. This finding highlights the potential impact of excessive news consumption on fear and anxiety during times of crisis.
Be conscious of the content you consume through media and social platforms. Limit exposure to negative or harmful content and prioritize positivity. Whatever your weekly screentime reports, aim to decrease it by at least 10 percent.
What do you think about your relationship to social media and the news? The next time you log onto your socials or news sites, pay attention to the sensations in your body.
5. Awareness of Nature
Nature has a remarkable ability to heal and nourish the human spirit. Spending time in natural environments, whether it’s a park, beach, forest, or mountainside, can significantly impact our well-being. Studies show that being in nature reduces stress, lowers blood pressure, and improves mood.5 The beauty and tranquility of the outdoors have a calming effect on the mind, helping to alleviate anxiety and depression. Embracing nature also encourages physical activity, making it a win-win for overall well-being.
Be present and fully engaged when in nature. Use your senses to observe the beauty around you, and let it nourish your spirit. Make walking your dog into an awe-inspiring experience simply by attending to all your senses.
For example, one of us lives in a more mountainous area and the other lives by the ocean. We take pictures of where we are and text them to each other with a few words about what we’re up to, and the appreciation of nature and the importance of being out in nature for us is clear. It’s a non-negotiable part of how we choose to live our lives; how we prioritize what we’re going to do in a day.
Can’t get outside today? Research has shown that even viewing nature has positive psychological and physiological effects. If you’ve ever been sitting in a waiting room that’s streaming Moving Art on Netflix,6 which is a brilliant idea, you’ve probably experienced the effects of the images and ambient sounds (or music, which can be another well-being booster). What’s your favorite natural environment? How about scrolling through some images and then making one your wallpaper on your computer?7 Pay attention to how you feel when you’re in nature or looking at it,8 and find a way to incorporate nature, in some way, into your days.
How can you add some nature to your days?
Shaping Your Way of Being
Well-being isn’t an end-state. Instead, it’s a work in progress, until the day you die. You build on it, or you tear it down, each day, with each choice you make about what to do, what to expose yourself to, who to connect with, and how you think and make decisions.
All those tiny habits9 inform your way of being when you’re with your clients. Again, AX CX. Whether you’re rested, aware of where your body is and what it’s doing, or preoccupied, you’re sending messages to your clients about how present you are and whether you’re attuned to them or in your own world, going through the motions. Being available for another person in a moment isn’t as easy as you might think. But if you want to increase your capacity to be fully present for others, awareness is your first step.
Endnotes:
- Fortin, J., and M. Martin. 2023. “To Best Connect with Clients, Connect with Yourself.” Journal of Financial Planning 36 (2): 42–45.
- Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace: 2023 Report can be downloaded here: www.gallup.com/workplace/349484/state-of-the-global-workplace-2022-report.aspx.
- See www.apa.org/news/press/releases/stress/2022/concerned-future-inflation.
- See www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7490003/.
- See www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-44097-3.
- See https://movingart.com/netflix/.
- See www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4929355/.
- See www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6926748/.
- For more on Tiny Habits, the book and the process, go to Stanford Behavioral Scientist BJ Fogg’s site: www.bjfogg.com/.